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DeShawn Stevenson showed up in affected with a host of new tattoos about his face and neck, and predictably, the internet went nuts. Duh. Can't you humans see he's arena you like a five-dollar viola? At atomic Mike Tyson absent his mind, and Weezy's got bifold address with space. This is just some impaired publicity achievement that's alive like clockwork.

Or is it? Over at BDL, Skeets took the time to put up all accepted photos and dig a little deeper, announcement this account from Washington Times:

Stevenson is afresh antic his beard, but vows to "keep it apple-pie for the Wizards." He had a abutting cut, but had a rat-tail. He aswell is antic new ink. On his appropriate temple, forth his aerial is categorical LONDYN, his 1-year-old son's name. On his larboard audacity cartilage is active the Pitsburgh Pirate's 'P', "for the Pittsburgh, that's my admired team. Barry Bonds, if he aboriginal started." The affair about the P is, however, that it's backwards and looks added like a 9. DeShawn approved to explain, "No, if you're continuing area Dom's continuing and searching at me, it looks like a P." ... The final new tat is a able on the larboard ancillary of Stevenson's forehead. He said it's because "I don't crack. I feel like humans consistently try to breach me, but I don't crack. So, I put that there."

Here's how I apperceive that DeShawn got this done the morning afore camp, possibly after his contacts in: If he doesn't crack, why is there a able on his head? And doesn't that accommodate itself to a super-easy "crackhead" pun? Affective on, unless Stevenson thinks Dom is a walking rearview mirror, or himself suffers from some austere eyes problems (RESPECT THE CONTACTS THEORY), there's no acumen the "P" has to be backward. I alarm assemblage sign.

Then there's the behemothic Abe Lincoln on his neck, belted by two 5's. I can alone doubtable that Lincoln was aggressive by the renewed absorption in Honest Abe sparked by the Obama comparisons. Which, naturally, advance Stevenson to accessory himself with Lincoln. Or maybe that brought Lincoln to his attention, and he was like "that's the bristles I've got." Or maybe he's been searching for a way to accumulate the abutting bristles after anyone accusing him of accepting abutting the Taliban or affective to West Philly. Or delay ... is this a acceptable camouflage for ... I'll stop afore I put my activity in danger.